Getting a divorce is a painful and difficult process.
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Neighbors, friends and family members will offer both wanted and unwanted divorce advice whether or not they have experienced it themselves. Everybody knows somebody who has been through a divorce even if they have not personally experienced it. Most of the advice is given with an earnest wish to be helpful and some of it is given simply because people are curious and want to know more about what is going on with your situation. Be careful about whose advice you listen to.
Every divorce is unique and every state has its own unique divorce statutes. Your neighbor may have good advice based on a hearing she experienced in another state that may be absolutely irrelevant for the state in which you live. Your best friend may give you divorce advice based on her experience as somebody who went through it but whose spouse instigated the proceedings. Even if your spouse also instigated the process and your circumstances appear to be similar to somebody else’s experience it is crucial that you seek divorce advice from an experienced attorney in your state. Only an experienced attorney licensed to practice law in the state in which you live at the time you seek the divorce can give you accurate information about the legal process in your state and relevant advice about what to do given your unique circumstances.
Divorce is sadly common these days and people offer divorce advice as though their experience can somehow help you to navigate your divorce. Although there may be common emotional experiences among divorcing couples every marriage is different. Every couple has different expectations and every outcome will be different based on the relationship between the divorcing couple, the longevity of the marriage, the assets owned, whether or not children are involved and a myriad of other factors. It is important to know that each person going through a divorce has rights during the divorce process and in reaching an agreement. These rights exist whether or not you are the one who filed for divorce.
Receiving divorce advice from a knowledgeable divorce attorney in the state in which the divorcing couple is living is crucial. Divorce is painful but it will be less painful if you take the time at the beginning of the process to look for and receive advice that is relevant for you.